Transitioning from Pole Dancer to Parent

By Jane Blair

Posted: Fri 21 Jul, 2023

Transitioning from Pole Dancer to Parent

For a lot of polers, pole dancing is more than just a hobby – it’s an identity. It can be tricky transitioning from a pole dancer who’s in the studio multiple times per week, working hard, feeling creative and engaged, socialising, maybe wearing flashy costumes and heels, to becoming a parent where the majority of your time is spent at home caring for your little one. It can feel incredibly isolating for some of us!

It’s important to remember that nobody has only one identity, and that pole dancing is only one part of your identity. You may also be a mother, a partner, a daughter, an accountant, a business owner, a friend, etc. And these parts of your identity are all important too. It’s okay to go through stages where one of your identities is more dominant than the others – it’s a normal part of life, and you are still you!

Here are some things that may help you feel like yourself again while you’re pregnant or postpartum and can’t pole as much as you would like, or perhaps at all:

❤️Catch up with people from the pole studio socially (this could also be via video call).

❤️Set aside some time each day to focus on you. This could mean doing an exercise class, reading a book, meditating, watching Netflix, or simply allowing yourself time to sit and daydream somewhere comfy with snacks.

❤️Treat yourself to some new pole wear that you feel good in, or any kind of outfit that reminds you of that part of yourself.

❤️Do some online pole classes (if your doctor has given you the all clear!)

❤️Set some goals for when you return to pole. Buy a fancy notebook and write them down, or just keep them in your phone – whatever feels right.

❤️Immerse yourself in the pole world by watching comps and performances online and supporting your pole buddies in their achievements.

Remember, it is normal to feel some loss of identity during pregnancy or postpartum, however, if you are feeling particularly low or not yourself, remember to reach out to friends, family or a mental health professional to talk about what you’re going through.

If you suspect you may have perinatal depression, PANDA is a fantastic resource:

Want to learn more about pole dancing through pregnancy and postnatal? Pole Mamas is having a sale! Check it out here: 



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By Jane Blair

Jane is a PoleSphere co-director and the founder of APDM, Australian Pole Dancers Magazine, which she first published in summer 2013. Jane represents Bottoms Up Burlesque in Melbourne and had her bright and beautiful light officially recognised when was crowned the "Sparkliest Dancer" in 2017, winning the Sponsors Choice award from Shimmy and Sparkle at Dance Filthy.